How many of you know a person who steps onto the court to play tennis, and is swearing at himself in less than five minutes? He misses a shot and says things to himself that he wouldn’t say to his spouse, children, friends, or his dog. This verbal self-abuse is painful to watch, or to try to ignore from the next court. Eventually, he leaves the court, acting as if his behavior has been perfectly normal, and that the process of natural selection isn’t breathing down his neck.
I’ve personally never done anything like that, and I’m sure you haven’t either, so neither of us has to take any of this personally. Sometimes, I feel like part of my purpose in life is to suggest things that subsequently seem obvious.
When they look surprised or angry after missing an easy shot, professional players sometimes have good reason to be upset. If they lose the match, they make smaller deposits at the bank.
The rest of us really have no business getting angry when we miss a shot. Evaluating our natural level of talent and how often we practice, we should be pleasantly surprised if we hit a ball that happens to land in the court.
Imagine relieving the pressure to perform, and happily focusing on the process of making it feel good when you hit the ball. Success follows happiness, not the other way around.